Mum its the new year and nothing much has changed...same things day after day i know its my own fault so i will just have to pull myself together and get ready to leave...I have people waiting in America to welcome me as one of their own so there is a life for me there....Scott Stacey and Samantha are all grown up and have lives of their own so it wont feel as if im deserting them....God mum im lonely and afraid please pray for me, bye